OH MY GOD
My boss just texted me asking to come into work at 4:30 in the morning and I threw my phone down and was like “you’re such a faggot I fucking hate you” and then I heard the Siri confirmation noise and I picked up my phone and
(Source: pizzaforpresident)
(Source: zoeysugg)
lets take this to the bedroom
i say as i carry my bowl of ice cream to my room
Anal eyes analyze anal lies
sleeping comes so naturally to me like i could do it with my eyes closed tbh
(Source: lostupnorth)
that one day when you think your period is over so you dont wear a pad or a tampon
(Source: palebutt)




